Circle of Influence

"Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise. But the companion of fools will suffer harm." Proverbs 13:20

I follow a simple rule: prioritize people who make life beautiful. It is quite cliché, but as I began practicing this lifestyle, drastic changes were seen in the way I presented myself. You are who you surround yourself with. I truly believe it. Like Jim Rohn says, "You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with," so are those five people benefitting or holding you back from your highest potential?

I have mentioned countless and countless times in previous entries the astronomical love I have for my friends and family. So many times that people are probably sick of reading it. My circle of influence did not form overnight--I had to face hardship and years of lessons for me to understand quality over quantity. That, it does not matter how many friends you claim to have, but instead, the type of friends you involve yourself with. My mother has taught me to hang tight to the people who make me feel the most alive; the people who make life colorful.

I love meeting people; I love getting to know people. It is one of the purest things to turn a stranger into a friend. Why do I love conversing with new people? I have not the slightest idea of the importance they may play in my future, but I am always eager to find out. The first interaction is the most predominant to me. If you ask any of my closest friends when I meet a stranger, I do two things: 1. smile and 2. hug. I smile to show endearment; to show that I mean well. I hug to grow a connection; to reassure them that they can trust me and that I appreciated our conversation to a great extent. From the first get-go, I can typically tell if that person will either improve or harm my personal growth. Did I figure this out overnight? Of course not. Experience is powerful. I had to go through failed friendships/relationships for me to understand that not everyone is supposed to fit into your timeline. I'll write it again: quality over quantity.

---

I dug up some research on friendship by the Greek philosopher, Aristotle. He claims there are three types of friendship: friendship of utility, friendship of pleasure, and friendship of the good.

Friendship of utility is where a bond is created solely for self-interest. You believe you get something out of it (popularity, recognition, money, etc.) and abuse their support. These friendships tend to fall apart rather quickly.

Friendship of pleasure revolves around experiencing a pleasant, fun time with a person. There is nothing wrong with this until you desire stability, then the friendship becomes nonexistent. These bonds rely mostly on having a thrill, but the lack of support is clear when a hardship presents itself.

Friendship of the good is the real gem here. It is a friendship that you are not using for your benefit; it is a friendship you do not toss aside when things get hard. It is where you let someone get to know who you are, even your weaknesses. No time or distance can ruin these bonds--you are in it for life. These friendships are what this blog post is about.

---

I take great pride in who is in my life right now. There is not one person who is in contact with me that brings negativity and disconcertment into my lifestyle. There are people I, unfortunately, fell off with who are just as amazing, but closing a chapter in my book is far different than tearing the pages out if that makes sense. There is no one I regret meeting; everyone I have gotten the opportunity to encounter has improved my life in one way, shape, or form. Whether it was showing me the type of friendship/relationship that was not fit for my life or the support and love I so desired, I needed to be presented with what I did not want for me to understand what I yearned for.

---

"How do I know the people in my life are right for me?"

Simple.

Who are you with when you feel the most alive?

Who are you with when you feel the most secure?

Who do you know will have your back when you fall?

Who are you able to be your authentic self around with no fear of judgment?

Who would you run to when you find yourself in a big crowd of people?

If a person came to your mind when reading these questions, you found your answer. Keep that special someone close--they play an important role in who you are and will help you find peace.

If you did not have a person come to mind, that is a-okay. It means you will encounter someone so beautiful that will fix your mindset of friendship. Patience is key. Message me, I would love to talk more about this.

---

My circle keeps me sane. Without my beautiful friends and family, I would be completely lost. I am so beyond grateful for each person in my life who has supported and guided me to be the best version of myself. "Leah: In Progress" is about personal growth within and experiences I have dealt with that made me stronger; it is about my mindsets on life and how I got to practice them. Even though it is about personal growth, I have to give credit where credit is due. My community is a big part of who I am. They have given me countless words of wisdom. They have shown me the best characters. They have provided a helping hand to numerous, difficult situations. It is okay to be by yourself, in fact, I love my alone time. However, some people love and think the world of you--let them be a part of your growth.

Thank you to my circle. Thank you for setting me straight. Thank you for the endless love and support you give to me. Thank you for reminding me of what I deserve. Thank you for being genuine, fun people who make every day an adventure. Thank you for influencing me to live the best life I can. Truly a gift, and although words cannot do my gratitude justice, I hope this blog entry is sufficient.