I read somewhere, "Train your mind to hear what God is whispering, not what the enemy is shouting."
And it resonated with me,
Because my head can become so cluttered with negativity, what-ifs, and insecurity, and it sure is not Jesus saying those things.
I will be the first to admit that my mind can be so loud. Overthinking is one of my biggest struggles. I have spent years upon years understanding different techniques to quiet it down, such as new hobbies, placing myself in therapy, and indulging in self-help books or podcasts. And although these tricks helped and allowed me to regain control over my anxiety, there are still days when my overthinking gets the best of me. This can be discouraging — so very discouraging — especially for someone who is so infatuated with life and who has tried many mechanisms to keep my head straight.
Tossing and turning at night because you can't stop replaying conversations.
Losing your appetite because you are nervous about what is to come later that day.
Staring blankly in the midst of a group hangout because you can't seem to enjoy the present moment, and it frustrates you even more so.
Asking for constant reassurance, but even with your friends and family telling you it's okay, you can't seem to believe them.
Your mind is loud; that is what this means. You are feeding it things to make it even louder. I make my problems worse about 90% of the time, and my mother has always told me this growing up. But it couldn't be more accurate. The more you think of something, the more you spiral. You make up ten different outcomes, most likely all bad. You make up a bunch of conversations that may or may not happen. You tell yourself disheartening things because you prepare yourself for the worst. Why not think of what could go right?
There is a sense of freedom in realizing that no matter how many situations you create, how many conversations you imagine, and how hard you are on yourself, the result is not up to you.
I'm Christian, so I give it to God.
But I know some of my friends/readers are not, and in that case, understand that you cannot control everything in your life. And find peace in that. Stop trying to understand everything.
So on my "good days," what helps me get out of my head the most?
A good morning sets me up for success. This entails waking up early, seeing the sunrise, talking with the Lord, getting some coffee flowing through me, slowing down my routine, stretching/moving my body, listening to worship music, journaling, and cuddling with my cat.
To me, a productive morning presents a productive day. And productivity is a big factor in calming my mind. Not to distract myself, but instead, to fit many fulfilling things into my day.
Working out is another big factor. You exert the energy you put into overthinking into your body instead. My therapist shared a great coping mechanism for anxiety: DBT TIPP. TIPP is a strategy to reduce distressing moments. I suggest looking it up and learning more about this; it is one of the most influential topics she and I have discussed. The 'I' stands for intense workout. Working out releases stress hormones and increases the levels of feel-good neurotransmitters. I find that if I begin overthinking or if an anxiety attack is creeping in, if I lift heavy, incorporate cardio like running or the stair master, or get my heart rate increasing and my body sweating, my mind begins to quiet down. It replaces the need for control. Instead of trying to control the inevitable, why don't we control how we treat our bodies physically? Because physical health corresponds with mental health.
And the most substantial and easiest way to get me out of my head is prayer. Sitting, talking, or worshiping the Lord is the remedy that never fails. Let me describe some instances that can paint a better picture:
My emetephobia creeps in, and I start panicking that I will throw up. --> "Lord, if it is supposed to happen, I trust you will bring me out of it."
I am scared to have a difficult conversation. --> "Lord, let this conversation I am about to have represent you in every way possible."
My mind starts saying, "I can't, I can't, I can't." --> In His name, I can.
I start to believe everyone is against me, or my mind begins to play tricks. --> "Lord, help me understand things my ego is preventing me from understanding."
I do not get something I so desperately wanted. --> "Lord, thank you for revealing what you have planned for me."
When I finally started to combat my anxiety with my relationship with God, my mind started to simmer down. I was constantly worrying because I was constantly assuming God would fail me. Because let's be real, the enemy's goal is to make you turn against God and depend on substances, temptations, accusations, etc. And I bet you a hundred bucks that stuff does not lead to a quiet life, let alone a quiet mind. Whether you believe in God or not, living in guilt, agony, or anger will not lead you to where you want to be. A gentle life begins with being gentle to yourself. It is our first time experiencing life; give yourself and your mind some grace.
So, although this is still a current struggle of mine — getting out of my head — it has been made simpler. With slower mornings, intense workouts, and time with the Lord, my mind is a calmer place to stay in. And I encourage you to find your own motivations, or mojo perse. What brings you the most peace? I'm eager to know.
My mind, my struggles, and myself are no match for God. He is bigger than all my trials and tribulations. And if you leave with anything from this entry, let it be that you will persevere from whatever it is that your mind is telling you. You are not your thoughts. You are not less than. If you ever need a friend or just someone to brainstorm ideas for a quiet life, please do not hesitate to reach out. I would love nothing more than to do so.
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